November has flown by. With good reason. Michael and I, after much deliberation and negotiation, decided to try one more IVF cycle. We started in November. Not much had changed in the 6 years since I tried with Addison. Since we used up all our frozen embryos on our last attempt, we had to start at the beginning....shots and all.
It wasn't all that bad and the effects were expected at least so we were a little more prepared for the emotional roller coaster that ensued. I think back fondly of my first entries of my blog, originally drafted as therapy as I went through my first IVF cycle.
This time I decided to keep it hush hush in case it didn't work. I realized that so many people were riding the coaster with me and it really was just unneccessary to take them along on the same sort of journey just in case it didn't work. And....I was more prepared to handle it all much better this time.
Dr. Servy has become a personal friend over the years and was excited to get another opportunity to help us once more. Several of the nurses were still there and going to see them each visit was like coming home to family. He reassured me that this time I wouldn't be as sick because he knew how much medecine would overstimulate me and so he had a baseline to go by.
He was right. It was tolerable and there was no hospital visit the weekend after the retrieval. I still produced a whopping 17 eggs. I am a good egg maker.
After fertilization, 13 were viable: 7 were in excellent shape and 6 were in good shape. Everything went so smoothly and I was compliments on exactly how beautifully perfect my embryos were.
Honestly, it scared me. I had some sort of superstitious belief that it wouldn't work unless it was hard..very hard.
This was going so smoothly.
I still managed to keep the process a secret from everyone except Addison's Pre-K class. I did not shield her from the process and every day, she would go to school and update the class on mommy "trying to get a baby." Apparently they prayed for me daily.
Addison prayed too, for a sister. She was adament that she did not want a boy. I told her if she wanted a sister, she needed to talk to God. Each conversation I secretly wished and hoped that I would not have to disappoint her with no baby.
In my heart, it all just felt right. The timing, the process, the desire, the hope..it was all there and everything was seeming to go so well. I believed deep down this would work.
Our transfer was November 20th. On December 2nd, I tested positive.
We are now 5 weeks and 5 days along and every person, stranger or not, knows that I have a baby in my tummy thanks to Addison.
Michael is in awe that I am once again carrying his child. Addison is elated and talks incessantly about "the baby". I am cautious of course because it's so early. But the idea is slowly growing on me. It will be more realistic once we have the first sonogram. I really need that visual. Although, I have been so incredibly tired that its hard to function. Then there's the nausea anytime I'm the slightest bit hungry. This mustard seed sized little bit inside me is totally taking over.
It's been 6 years. I've forgotten so much. And I'm excited.
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