Monday, February 14, 2011

Fertility: The Sequal

January 14, 2008 was the day my blog was born. It was born out of a necessity to share my fertility journey and has since turned into the chronicles of my life. I love my blog like it was my child although the real kid (Addison) takes a lot of time away from it.
Addison is 27 months old now. The pressures of time and age are pressing down on us to either stay a single child family or try again. For Addison's sake, we've decided to try for another child. So she can know the joy of a sibling...or the torture. I thought my journey would begin today. I had the appointments, I had the tests, I even had the prescriptions. For twenty minutes I sat at lunch discussing my fears and excitement with Michael. Then the doctor's office called with news of an abnormal test result. So, my journey is postponed (hopefully) for a month or so until I can get a biopsy and the results.
All technical issues aside, I was really scared today at the thought of getting pregnant again. I'm not the best pregnant person by any means. But, before - with Addison - I didn't know what to expect. It was all pretty stories and fairytales of babies. Now, I have lived the reality and I'm pretty sure that's the part that scared me....actually knowing what I was in for.
I also know, however, the end result is amazing and that is surely what drives any mother to give birth again.
There's also the worry, in the far depths of my mind, of how I could love another child as much as I love my Addison. It just doesn't seem possible. I hope to find out.
In the meantime, if you are a follower from way back, welcome back to the original theme!
Here we go again, on another roller coaster ride.