It's the last week of my first trimester. The vomiting has not stopped yet. Its not continuous, but it is still there.
I had to share this moment from last night. Addison walked in on my latest visit with the toilet. She seems to be able to hear it from a mile away. It's hard to talk in the midst of that because I nearly pass out each time I start. But inevitably I have to answer the question: "Mommy, what's wrong?!"
Last night's answer was the same...the babies make mommy a little sick.
Her response was just priceless. She ran out of the room. A few moments later she returned with a porcelain doll that had a music box. "It's going to be OK mommy. I will make you feel better."
Then she wound up the music box and let the music play...to soothe me.
It was such a sweet gesture. Followed by the doll kissing me on the cheek as I sat recovering on the bathroom floor.
Definitely my angel baby.
Monday, February 3, 2014
The Snowpocolypse of 2014
Yep...snowed on wednesday...was 70 degrees on Saturday. Georgia. Where you can live all four seasons in one week.
Saturday, January 25, 2014
Fruit Basket
Every Saturday I pick up my phone time I wake up so I can see what developments are happening in my womb this week. Seems a little off that I have to refer to a web page for what's going on inside my own body, but alas I'd never have a clue if it weren't for all of these helpful web pages. So, today, I'm home to 2 kiwi. Last week it was limes. The week before they were prunes. I am just an ever changing fruit basket.
For those women out there who love pregnancy...more power to you. Personally, it's a pretty miserable time from constant sinus issues to problems with nausea and digestion and heartburn. Ugh. And now we've started the hormone headaches. It's just no fun. I live for visits to the doctor where I might hear or see my little ones.
But, we endure because - well, at this point we have to. :) That sounds bad but, if most women knew what they were really in for, they may not choose to have children. And I am totally confident that if child bearing were up to men - the human race would cease to exist.
OK, enough of my whining.
My kiwi's and I will endure one more week and finish out this first trimester where hopefully some of these symptoms will disappear.
For those women out there who love pregnancy...more power to you. Personally, it's a pretty miserable time from constant sinus issues to problems with nausea and digestion and heartburn. Ugh. And now we've started the hormone headaches. It's just no fun. I live for visits to the doctor where I might hear or see my little ones.
But, we endure because - well, at this point we have to. :) That sounds bad but, if most women knew what they were really in for, they may not choose to have children. And I am totally confident that if child bearing were up to men - the human race would cease to exist.
OK, enough of my whining.
My kiwi's and I will endure one more week and finish out this first trimester where hopefully some of these symptoms will disappear.
Sunday, January 12, 2014
Entering Human Kind
Today, I'm 10 weeks along. Today we go from being an embryo to an actual fetus. I'm guessing because the tail is gone and most of the orifices are there, this marks the graduation into the human race.
We had another sonogram at 8 weeks and everything looked wonderful. In fact, Dr. Servy released me to go to my regular OB. I think it's very early compared to Addison. I was sure that I stayed through my first trimester with her, but I'd have to check the records. That was 6 years ago.
I know its early but I am sure that I feel them. Every now and then a tiny little thud in my uterus. I recognize it this time so I'm confident it's not gas. I've spent a great deal of time planning this week...in my mind. I have rooms to ready, not just for the babies, but for Addison. She has to move. I have equipment to get and being on this ride for a second time, I will not be pulled into the trap of all this expensive baby equipment. I am going to be a craigslist guru. Already I've registered on Amazon because everything is so much cheaper there.
On a personal note, I'm still scared to death. I often ask other mothers how they love their other children as opposed to their first. Addison is my world. Sometimes I wonder if there's going to be enough of me to go around. I'm pretty sure that its just like in the story of the Grinch that stole Christmas (strange analogy I know), My heart will just grow two more sizes to accommodate all the love that I will have for these new children. It's an honest concern I think. Maybe one that some mothers don't voice, but I know I'm not having an original thought here.
Addison is still so excited. She is precious each time she kisses my belly. She tells me she loves the babies and that she is excited that they are coming. She melts me and her excitement is part of what makes this bearable. I am not a great pregnant person. I hurt and I ache, a lot. There is never any part of my day where I'm not reminded that I'm pregnant. I am sick a lot with this pregnancy and I hardly ever throw up in normal life. But between my Addison and Michael who literally thanks me daily for doing this for our family, I can bear it all. I try not to think about my skin stretching even more than last time or the fact that I will not sleep at all the last 3 months due to TWO bouncing babies who like to move at night. Nor do I dwell on the post-partum weight loss or the hideousness of my after-twin belly. I just look at my daughter and my husband and think to myself...we are a family. This is my family and for them I would move heaven and earth. As my family grows, as I grow, as my heart grows.....I will find the relief in them.
We had another sonogram at 8 weeks and everything looked wonderful. In fact, Dr. Servy released me to go to my regular OB. I think it's very early compared to Addison. I was sure that I stayed through my first trimester with her, but I'd have to check the records. That was 6 years ago.
On a personal note, I'm still scared to death. I often ask other mothers how they love their other children as opposed to their first. Addison is my world. Sometimes I wonder if there's going to be enough of me to go around. I'm pretty sure that its just like in the story of the Grinch that stole Christmas (strange analogy I know), My heart will just grow two more sizes to accommodate all the love that I will have for these new children. It's an honest concern I think. Maybe one that some mothers don't voice, but I know I'm not having an original thought here.
Addison is still so excited. She is precious each time she kisses my belly. She tells me she loves the babies and that she is excited that they are coming. She melts me and her excitement is part of what makes this bearable. I am not a great pregnant person. I hurt and I ache, a lot. There is never any part of my day where I'm not reminded that I'm pregnant. I am sick a lot with this pregnancy and I hardly ever throw up in normal life. But between my Addison and Michael who literally thanks me daily for doing this for our family, I can bear it all. I try not to think about my skin stretching even more than last time or the fact that I will not sleep at all the last 3 months due to TWO bouncing babies who like to move at night. Nor do I dwell on the post-partum weight loss or the hideousness of my after-twin belly. I just look at my daughter and my husband and think to myself...we are a family. This is my family and for them I would move heaven and earth. As my family grows, as I grow, as my heart grows.....I will find the relief in them.
My main squeeze
I went on my first field trip with Addison. We went to the Maxwell Theatre at GRU to see a really amazing Christmas dance show. I was impressed that something of that caliber was put on here by a local dance company. Needless to say, the kids were hopping and the music had a beat. Together, it was an amusing mess.
Lest I ever forget, Addison's first two little friends, Kate and Margaret. I'm not quite sure who the little boy is, but he's a smart one...in the midst of all those beautiful ladies.
There were lots of long days this Christmas season. They just wore my precious out.
I am always happy to attend Christmas parties. It's a highlight of the season for me. I love the food and the fun and usually the drinking. Although this year I was totally curbed by my two new additions I'm carrying. It just made for a really really fun night for Michael with his personal driver.
Yeah. It's a cow bench. But she wanted her picture taken on it. Who am I to argue? Plus she takes such a good photo....even with a cow.
A more plastered smile with Santa. She's still a firm believer, but just doesn't quite trust these men in red.
We had a fun and full Christmas with the Jeffcoats. These girls could not get enough of each other. I know each of them wishes she had a sister, so they were literally inseparable. Such an amazing thing to witness.
It was our first real Christmas tree since we've been married. I loved it despite the falling needles. The smell was glorious and just so much less trouble that pulling out the 9 ft gargantuan fake tree in our attic. I was too tired this year to put up any other decorations besides what you see here. I really hate that we didn't go all out like we usually do with the lights outside, but it was literally impossible. These babies are zapping the life out of me.
And lastly, who needs playground equipment when you have lawn equipment. Just as much fun! Look how happy she is.
Sunday, December 22, 2013
The T word
There are moments in life that take your breath away. Sometimes in a good way and other times in a terrible way. When you lose a loved one unexpectedly it's as if all the oxygen in the room has been sucked out leaving you grasping for breath.
Thursday I experienced this on another level...the good level...the terrifying level.
We went in for our first sonogram since the positive pregnancy test. THE test that would tell us how many eggs took hold.
I'm sure you can see where I'm going with this.
Dr. Servy inserted the probe and bam...there they were. Two separate hollow spots on the screen with a tiny cashew in the middle of each.
He's a slight comedian, Dr. Servy, as he sang part of a Christmas song:
"Do you see what I see?" He was staring right at Michael.
The picture started bouncing around...it was moving because I was laughing. Not quite joyful, but a nervous, can't believe what I'm seeing sort of laugh that shook my whole body and the sonogram picture. Pictures were taken, measurements made and much to my surprise....we could hear heartbeats on both..ALREADY!
That swishing sound was the sound of hope and terror all rolled into one.
After the doctor left, Michael and I looked at each other with wide-eyed wonderment.
"Wow. Two babies. Twins." he said.
And then the gates opened and I cried. More like wept or bawled. It was an ugly cry either way.
Don't get the wrong idea, I was not upset. I was happy.
I was also scared to death!!
So many scenarios of two against one flashed in my mind so rapidly. The realization that I may not sleep soundly for the next year. The overwhelming thought of "Can I handle two at once and maintain my sanity?" So I cried. And cried.
The doctor came back in after 10 minutes or so to check on us and see if we were ever coming out.
I was not naive enough to think that this could not happen, but I was not prepared for the actual reality of it all. Our small family of 3 blossoming into a family of 5. A dream come true really. We would, one day, have that massive Christmas dinner with everyone and their spouses and kids. I would have that large family and plenty of children to love. I would be considered a real mom... a status that sometimes seems elusive because I am only mother to one child.
It took the rest of the day to soak in and every person I told had to participate in another cry fest. But hey, it was therapy. The more I said the word "twins", the more comfortable I was with the concept.
Michael was in shock too. The entire day a fog for him as he tried to maintain normal tasks and come to grip with two babies.
We have talked a lot and are quite confident that we can do this now.
Addison is over the moon excited. She is still very adamant that we have her a sister. For her sake, I hope one of them is a girl or she'll be mad at me for a bit.
My favorite saying from her this week is, "Mommy I'll feed the babies, but you change the diapers. Poo poo is not my favorite."
She cracks me up.
She also told me that God didn't listen. I asked what she meant.
She said "I prayed for one baby (Holding up her finger). God didn't listen."
I assured her that God knows what he's doing and that he gave us two babies because he knew we'd be a great family for them. And that's what I keep telling myself.
So, here I am, consumed every minute of every day with the fact that I am carrying two children. In one respect I glad for the fact because all my pants were already too tight at 6 weeks. I was afraid I was ballooning already. However, with the justification that I have 2 children growing in there, I have confidently already started wearing maternity pants. Goodness I've missed these things. I am pretty sick on a regular basis. The urge to vomit invades my every waking moment. Sometimes I can stave it off, other times it wins. Not fun either way. I do know this. These babies love milk and meat...beef mainly. No sweets, no carbs, no veggies...just meat. I feel live a ravenous carnivore at times. I need my own cows for many reasons at this point.
Here's our first live shot of the TWINS....there's that word again. Whew!
Thursday I experienced this on another level...the good level...the terrifying level.
We went in for our first sonogram since the positive pregnancy test. THE test that would tell us how many eggs took hold.
I'm sure you can see where I'm going with this.
Dr. Servy inserted the probe and bam...there they were. Two separate hollow spots on the screen with a tiny cashew in the middle of each.
He's a slight comedian, Dr. Servy, as he sang part of a Christmas song:
"Do you see what I see?" He was staring right at Michael.
The picture started bouncing around...it was moving because I was laughing. Not quite joyful, but a nervous, can't believe what I'm seeing sort of laugh that shook my whole body and the sonogram picture. Pictures were taken, measurements made and much to my surprise....we could hear heartbeats on both..ALREADY!
That swishing sound was the sound of hope and terror all rolled into one.
After the doctor left, Michael and I looked at each other with wide-eyed wonderment.
"Wow. Two babies. Twins." he said.
And then the gates opened and I cried. More like wept or bawled. It was an ugly cry either way.
Don't get the wrong idea, I was not upset. I was happy.
I was also scared to death!!
So many scenarios of two against one flashed in my mind so rapidly. The realization that I may not sleep soundly for the next year. The overwhelming thought of "Can I handle two at once and maintain my sanity?" So I cried. And cried.
The doctor came back in after 10 minutes or so to check on us and see if we were ever coming out.
I was not naive enough to think that this could not happen, but I was not prepared for the actual reality of it all. Our small family of 3 blossoming into a family of 5. A dream come true really. We would, one day, have that massive Christmas dinner with everyone and their spouses and kids. I would have that large family and plenty of children to love. I would be considered a real mom... a status that sometimes seems elusive because I am only mother to one child.
It took the rest of the day to soak in and every person I told had to participate in another cry fest. But hey, it was therapy. The more I said the word "twins", the more comfortable I was with the concept.
Michael was in shock too. The entire day a fog for him as he tried to maintain normal tasks and come to grip with two babies.
We have talked a lot and are quite confident that we can do this now.
Addison is over the moon excited. She is still very adamant that we have her a sister. For her sake, I hope one of them is a girl or she'll be mad at me for a bit.
My favorite saying from her this week is, "Mommy I'll feed the babies, but you change the diapers. Poo poo is not my favorite."
She cracks me up.
She also told me that God didn't listen. I asked what she meant.
She said "I prayed for one baby (Holding up her finger). God didn't listen."
I assured her that God knows what he's doing and that he gave us two babies because he knew we'd be a great family for them. And that's what I keep telling myself.
So, here I am, consumed every minute of every day with the fact that I am carrying two children. In one respect I glad for the fact because all my pants were already too tight at 6 weeks. I was afraid I was ballooning already. However, with the justification that I have 2 children growing in there, I have confidently already started wearing maternity pants. Goodness I've missed these things. I am pretty sick on a regular basis. The urge to vomit invades my every waking moment. Sometimes I can stave it off, other times it wins. Not fun either way. I do know this. These babies love milk and meat...beef mainly. No sweets, no carbs, no veggies...just meat. I feel live a ravenous carnivore at times. I need my own cows for many reasons at this point.
Here's our first live shot of the TWINS....there's that word again. Whew!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)